I'm a big fan of figuring yourself out. You know, most of how we FEEL has a lot to do with what we BELIEVE. A while ago, I did this fun activity where I tried to write down everything I believe about life, and then figure out where each belief came from. I discovered that most of my beliefs came from the (for lack of a better word) programming I received from my parents. After all, these people have you and raise you, for better or worse... and they pass along their beliefs to you in the way they speak to you, the things they make or encourage you to do, and the actions they do or don't take. You watch and listen and follow their lead, and eventually you pop out an adult with your own set of beliefs about life which have been heavily influenced by your parents.
For example, when I went away to college I expressed my belief that the Catholic church was not the only right way to live. My mom challenged me to go speak to the priest, and I said that of course he would tell me to come back to church, he was a priest for goodness sake! I explored a few other Christian religions, was agnostic for a while, tried Atheism but it didn't take, and now I'm feeling like I kinda hate organized religion, but if I have to go for the community aspect, I guess being Catholic isn't so bad in the scheme of things- after all, I really don't believe any of them have it right. But at least I have explored all of my beliefs about religion and given myself the permission and freedom to make my own decisions.
Imagine doing that to every single one of your beliefs? It takes a while, don't get me wrong. But it is very freeing to explore what you believe and why, and come to your own conclusions.
Here's another one- "I'll never make money as a musician. Better choose something else." That was told to me day in and day out, by my mom who watched me practice my piano for 2 hours a day from age 8 to 18. She MADE me do it, and she knew I was incredibly good and talented. But then she would say that stupid crap to me, making me doubt my own existence. When you are a kid, you BELIEVE what your parents say. It's just the way things are. So here I am, busting my ass practicing this really difficult stuff (I had a Russian teacher) and spending my time doing that instead of having a social life, and my mom is telling me I suck and I better not even think about choosing music for a career. It produced a whole lot of confusion.
So instead, I pursued teaching (practical- big mistake) and had to sneak into the practice rooms at college to get on the piano (they were only for the music students). And wondered what was wrong with me and my musical abilities. The thing is, nothing was wrong with me. What was wrong was my mother's mistaken belief that music could not be a lucrative career for me. I definitely could have gone into some kind of professional concert experience- orchestra, symphony, even a band. But by the time I figured out what was wrong with my core belief (I'm not a good enough musician to make it) it was too late. I don't want to do the work it would take to get back into the condition I was in musically at the time, at this stage in my life. Instead I enjoy making music when I have the chance, and I'm looking into taking up another string instrument, one that is more portable so I can play for my friends.
Currently my limiting beliefs have to do with money (lack) and my ability to finish what I start (none). I'm enjoying this momentum challenge- today they guys challenged me personally, saying that this is the day a lot of people will drop out, and many won't make it past the 1/2 way point. I decided to do this- and I'm going to finish. By doing so, I will dissolve my belief that I can't finish what I set out to do.
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